Dear Sister Grenades,
I have a problem! I have been dating my boyfriend for over 3 yrs. now. Lately, I have been noticing an increase in communication amongst him and his ex. There are no kids involved and when we got together he made it clear that they are no longer. Theres no communication whatever so ever. However, the past four months seems to be a contradiction of what he told me over three years ago. I don't know maybe there has been communication and he has been hiding it or what not. I brought it to his attention and he told me I was tripping and to mind my damn business. If he loves me why would he speak to me in that way. I'm at my breaking point and so ready to leave, but me loving him is holding me back. I need some advice.
Signed,
Should I Leave
Dear Should I Leave,
First off thank you for writing us. Secondly, there seems to be few missing pieces to this puzzle. You said you been noticing an increase in communication with your boyfriend and his ex. What happened? Did you go searching for something? Did you hear a phone conversation or see a text message? What did you say when you brought it to his attention?
If something such as this is a factor then he should have sat and spoke with you about it. After three long years there really should not be any problems with discussing an issue that you have with him secretly talking to his ex. Let me be the one to inform you that LOVE is blind. If he loves you than no he should not have said mind your own damn business. Apparently he is guilty of something. I would say try a different approach this time around to address the issue. You can start off by saying "can we talk..."(you can finish the statement if he agrees to talk.) If it doesn't work out then you have to do whats best for you. You can always stick around and continue to feel the way you do or you can move on with your life and find someone who will not lie and hide things from you. There is plenty of fish in the sea. Please write us back with an update.
1 comment:
You should leave if you have tried everything if you have tried counseling and he refuses to go. If you are trying to make things work and he continue to be resistant to change maybe then you should take a step back or a break to make sure that this is worth fighting for or is this something that you should let go of. Love is a battle field but you have to make sure that you know what you are gong to battle for.
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