YES, YOU'RE MY FATHER, BUT NOW YOU WANT TO PLAY DADDY

SO...NOW YOU WANT TO BE A DADDY???

Growing up so many people, young and old, think highly of their fathers. Even when our mothers attempt to prove to us on numerous occasions that he, he aint shit. All of the false promises, the forgotten birthdays, every missed Christmas and I could go on...; we fail to realize that he's not who we would like for him to be. But when we grow up, we learn the true realities of life by growing mentally and finally understanding that our fathers are just that sperm donors.

Who do we blame? Do we blame his mother for not keeping a positive male figure in his life? Do we blame his father for not being a DADDY? Or do we blame him for not trying to beat all of the odds against him by becoming the DADDY he always yearn for himself?

So you heard another man is being a DADDY to you baby and the word has gotten around...Another man signed my birth certificate and even gave me his last name and where were you?. Seventeen years later you decide to walk into my life and want to play the role of daddy. You even had the audacity to ask if I'll change my last name to yours. What??? All of this could have been, if you would have stood as the man you claim to be and did your fatherly duties prior to me taking my first breath outside of my mothers womb.

Where were you when I kept my mom up all night and she had to be at school the next morning? Where were you every time I scrape my knee and needed someone to hold me and reassure that everything will be fine? Where were you when I wanted to learn how to ride a bike? Where were you on report card day, school performances, birthday parties, graduations, and other accomplishments? Where were you when that guy I dated broke my heart for the first time? Well you wasn't there, but my real DADDY was to fill into the shoes you never placed your feet in. It is a shame HE PICKED UP WHERE YOU NEVER LEFT OFF. But now after all these years you want to be a daddy.

You are my father and that is the only thing I thank you for being; the man that had the fun of creating me. Glad my mom had the sense to leave your sorry ass alone and got a hold of a real man who knew how to take care HIS responsibilities.


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I am dealing with the same situation, just not with my own father. My brother has had Five kids all in the system and living with either my parents or with me. He has four girls and from the time majority of the babies were one years old the only father figure they knew besides my Dad was my husband. They said Mar Mar before mouthing the words DA-DA like most other children. This was always just funny because these girls knew that my brother was their Father but when it came down to discipline or wanting affection, my brother could be in the same room and the girls will either go to my husband or cry out for him. I knew that must have hurt my brother but in that situation I only cared a little.

Five years went past and my nieces finally got a little brother. This little boy was due one week before my own son, so when the subject of which family member would care for him came up I made sure that me and my husband were clear that it would NOT be us. Time passed and so did the child I was carrying ... I had no intention of caring for someone else son who was due only eight days before my own son was. I considered it at first too emotional to handle then I took it as a sign that me and my husband can raise a child who needs a home.

When I got my nephew, he was two months old, the earliest we'd received any of my brothers children and because I worked over night my husband was the one who had the sleepless nights with a child who was having nightly withdraws from the drugs in his system. Naturally my nephew thought this was his father. No matter how many "I love my UNCLE" shirts we bought he saw this man as his father.

When talking started my nephew was the first of all my brothers children to call my husband "DADDY" and no matter how we tried to correct him we realized that he would NOT correct himself. My brother heard of this and swore we did it on purpose ... my attitude was WHO IS HE TO HAVE AN OPINION? My nephew don't know him! All he knows is the man he calls Daddy! The day my brother expressed his dislike of the situation was the day I stopped correcting my nephew. A one year old was giving credit where credit was due and I should have been too.