All relationships should possess some form of compromise, whether you're married or not. It is more common in marriages for some individuals to put some (if not all) of their life goals on hold to support their mate. Going back to school, promotions in the work place, getting laid off, and relocating are just a few examples of why some mates may need to hold off on achieving their own goals or dreams. It does not sound easy and in reality it is not, but in actuality this happens far more often than we may know.
I know this personally for myself. My sweetheart is currently serving in the United States military. I am supporting him as he protect and fight for our country and have place some of my goals on hold temporarily.
Compromise is not only used with the few issues stated above. It is also needed in marriages when there are children outside of the relationship are involved. And a thousand other reasons; some may be minuscule and others are more significant. Regardless, having a middle ground can accommodate some difference. Some are left with resentment because they agreed upon something they honestly do not consort with.
I've discovered a few great ways to compromise in a relationship that is going to last until the end of time. ;-) Maybe these can assist you and your relationship.
- Communication is the key to success. Be verbally open about how you feel about the situation. Do not hold anything in, you will eventually exploded if you do.
- Jot down a few pros and cons of the situation. See if both will benefit from it before making a final decision.
- Set aside your personal attitude, biases and place yourself in your mates shoes. Ask yourself are you disagreeing out of spite? Or are you being selfish?
- And lastly give it a try. "Nothing beats a try, but a failure."
1 comment:
Well, for health reasons my husband and I have changed positions in the relationship and he's the stay at home dad and I go out to work. Many look down their noses at this compromise because they actually think he's getting the better end of the stick when in all actuality I AM.
Yes, I am getting away with clear cut murder when it comes to many things. I go to work and many days are not that hectic, but his day goes a little like this: Washing Clothes, Moping floors, cleaning bathroom, washing dishes, cooking dinner, getting the kids dressed and dropping them off to school and many many times combing hair. He even attends meetings at the school, has to take them to doctors appointment, dentist, play dates and to add insult to injury he has to listen to all that arguing and fighting every day.
Lol..Sorry to laugh, but I just don't know how he does it because as of right now..these days, I just can't see myself making it through one full week of doing all that shit and still performing my wifely duties. After all that he still irons all the clothes and changes the sheets on all the beds in the house twice a week. He shops for snacks and special allergy food items. He has to read the directions and administer medications on the regular..Now you tell me: Would you do all this shit? Not me, I'm going to continue to be the one to work because I don't know a WOMAN that does all the things that he has to do and can still stand up and make the rules in the house work like they are suppose to. I'm like the respect he still gets as the man of the house is incredible and He Is The Man In My Life!
I love him for all that he does because when I was doing it, I made him help and he makes sure that I have to do nothing when I come in from work. I love my man and the wonderful compromise we have agreed upon and hell noll I'm not allowing nothing to break this shit up. It works for us and I appreciate all that he does. House wife/ House Husband? I see nothing wrong with it at all and the compromise works out just fine.
Dam, I'm so lucky to have such a wonderful man like the one I got! Thank you Lord for Blessing me with him.
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